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We
all know what anger is, and we've all felt it: whether as a fleeting annoyance
or as full-fledged rage.
Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But when
it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems—problems
at work, in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of
your life. And it can make you feel as though you're at the mercy of an
unpredictable and powerful emotion.
Like
other emotions, it is accompanied by physiological and biological changes;
when you get angry, your heart rate and blood pressure go up, as do the
levels of your energy hormones, adrenaline, and noradrenaline.
Anger
is "an emotional state that varies in intensity from mild irritation
to intense fury and rage," Like other emotions, it is accompanied
by physiological and biological changes; when you get angry, your heart
rate and blood pressure go up, as do the levels of your energy hormones,
adrenaline, and noradrenaline.
Anger can be caused by both external and internal events. You could be
angry at a specific person or event , or your anger could be caused by
worrying or brooding about your personal problems. Memories of traumatic
or enraging events can also trigger angry feelings.
The instinctive, natural way to express anger is to respond aggressively.
Anger is a natural, adaptive response to threats; it inspires powerful,
often aggressive, feelings and behaviors, which allow us to fight and
to defend ourselves when we are attacked. A certain amount of anger, therefore,
is necessary to our survival.
On the other hand, we can't physically lash out at every person or object
that irritates or annoys us; laws, social norms, and common sense place
limits on how far our anger can take us.
People use a variety of both conscious and unconscious processes to deal
with their angry feelings. The three main approaches are expressing, suppressing,
and calming. Expressing your angry feelings in an assertive—not
aggressive—manner is the healthiest way to express anger. To do
this, you have to learn how to make clear what your needs are, and how
to get them met, without hurting others. Being assertive doesn't mean
being pushy or demanding; it means being respectful of yourself and others.
Anger can be suppressed, and then converted or redirected. This happens
when you hold in your anger, stop thinking about it, and focus on something
positive. The aim is to inhibit or suppress your anger and convert it
into more constructive behavior. The danger in this type of response is
that if it isn't allowed outward expression, your anger can turn inward—on
yourself. Anger turned inward may cause hypertension, high blood pressure,
or depression.
Unexpressed anger can create other problems. It can lead to pathological
expressions of anger, such as passive-aggressive behavior (getting back
at people indirectly, without telling them why, rather than confronting
them head-on) or a personality that seems perpetually cynical and hostile.
People who are constantly putting others down, criticizing everything,
and making cynical comments haven't learned how to constructively express
their anger. Not surprisingly, they aren't likely to have many successful
relationships.
With the help of hypnosis, you can calm down inside. This means not just
controlling your outward behavior, but also controlling your internal
responses, taking steps to lower your heart rate, calm yourself down,
and let the feelings subside.
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